The Fud Fights Back with Rocket Red Pen/Lipstick
The Fuddy-Duddy Writer sees fit on this occasion to respond to her one fan on several points.
First, to her credit, she did quote her fan(s). What more do(es) (t)he(y) want? As an erstwhile historian, she’s prone to using footnotes, but since she achieved her fame she is now beyond that and thus relies on inspiration as it comes to her and feels the metaphysical world connects us all, plagiarism be damned (she has been called meta, after all).(1) In short, she honors her fan(s) in the way she knows best: with her references, suggestions, innuendos, nuanced links.
Second, the Fuddy-Duddy Writer reserves the right to be inspired by whatever and whoever crosses her path and moves her to write. Be it a certain serious writer, a sometimes well-meaning fan, or even a recently attended Love, Fest.(2) If the fan does not want to share her, then so be it. She is a child of the sixties, after all, and feels it most appropriate to share the love.
Third, the Fuddy-Duddy Writer feels honored The Fan would mention her Chair of the ALATUT – she only recently disassociated herself from the group in order to save a certain someone embarrassment regarding an incident involving ketchup, origami, and a blow-up exclamation point.
Finally, coming back to the plagiarism point — something she takes most seriously (having once slept with Stephen Ambrose and thus having gained a certain insight into all real and pretend meetings with Eisenhower (3); she’s faked a lot of things in her day, indeed she even faked it with Stevie himself but never mind that, she’s a fuddy-duddy about other things besides writing and therefore doesn’t share such secrets): she most certainly did not plagiarize The Fan. Her Red Rocket lipstick has been her signature facelook (you can see it on Facebook) for decades. She has never read the work cited by the Fan, a day uptown/a night on the bowery. A true fan would know that she never reads such low-brow smut.
1. See her publication in metazen, for example, or other interviews granted by other less known literary magazines such as WWWP (Women Writers With Principles – not to be confused with WWWP, Women Writers With Principals, a wellknown swingers club targeting people with specific needs/wants in Orange County in the late 1980s) and Wherefore Women? An Experiential and Existential Exploration.
2. The abovementioned Love, Fest was not in any way associated with Women Writers With Principals; once again: The Fud is not a member of that organization.
3. For more on this controversy, see Richard Raynor, “Channelling Ike” in The New Yorker, April 26, 2010; and Paul Harris, “Band of Brothers author accused of fabrication for Eisenhower biography” in The Guardian, April 25, 2010.
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